Monday, April 18, 2011

DJ Pauly D

This cut of fancy may not run the mama's boy game of Vinny but can still clean grenade shrapnel quicker than a Red Cross wet nurse.   When not chlorinating ur girl's jacuzzi he is getting his hair did.  A Providence native, it is rumored the spraypainted fescue sod on top of his forehead was the creation of a local RISD art student recovering from a ketamine trip.  Still we at F or D give Pauly props for owning the look and perhaps even giving it an endearing charm.  Indeed he pulled off the seemingly impossible task of making New Jersey fop!!  Few would associate the garden state with the scent of couture.  For more people this state is redolent of industrial sewage, toll roads, baby tees, Britney Spears' follow-up single "Sometimes" from her ...Baby One More Time LP, Taco Bell Beef Meximelts, pronouncing Target (TM) retail department stores with an affected French accent, the re-branding of the Bravo cable network, going to Taco Bell and asking for tap water and then pouring lemon-lime soft drink into your cup at the fountain machine, diner food, jean shorts and/or jorts, blowing into og NES Nintendo cartridges when the graphics are distorted, eating clubs, drinking cough syrup and waiting a half hour after lunch to settle ur stomach before lounging in ur MTV summer share hot tub.  Yes, Pauly D deserves our compliments and gratitude.  You can't spell gentleman without GTL we congratulate u sir may u feel like $100 on this special day.

Final verdict:  1 1/2 star fop

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